Questings of the Neeek

More like hurry up and HURRY UP!

2009-11-03T11:39:00.003-07:00

I receive my mission call 9 DAYS after my papers were turned in!! I was prepared to wait the average 3 or more weeks it ususally takes to receive a mission call and so I went on a camping trip with some friends. No cell phone reception. My Janni best friend was the first to receive the frantic message from my mother about a mysteriously large letter that had arrived for me (she being the only one with roaming, and could therefore check her voicemail in the canyon on our way down to town). There was much in the way of suprise and excitement the car ride home (and about 500 more frantic voicemail messages on just about everyone's phone when we found cell phone reception).

I opened my letter when we got to my house (still with a fine misting of red Moab dirt and Eau du Campfire) (don't worry, I waited for my mother to get home too)...

"You have been hearby called to serve... in the Florida Jacksonville Mission!"

WOW!!! I am so excited! I know that this is where the Lord wants me to be and that this is what I am supposed to be doing at this time in my life. I leave for the Provo MTC December 16th--so fast!! There is much to do and I am so excited! I am so blessed and so grateful for all of the help that I have been receiving. I am comforted and buoyed up more and more everyday and my excitement and testimony grows stronger as I strive to prepare to lose myself completely in serving my brothers and sisters wherever I am and being a tool in the hands of the Lord.

I love this Gospel! I love the hope and joy I have from my knowledge of Heavenly Father's Plan of Happiness for ALL of His children. I love my Savior, Jesus Christ, and I am forever grateful for His Atonement that makes it possible for me to repent of all sin and progress. I love my family! I love my friends! Thank you so much for you love and friendship! I love you all!

Hurry up and wait...

2009-10-06T22:40:00.002-06:00

I have been planning on serving an LDS mission for so long that I can't remember when I made the decision to go. I have finally gotten all my mission papers turned in as of 2 days ago!!! I can't believe it and think it is about time all at once. I have had a few people submit their guesses as to where I may go (among them Finland, France, Idaho, East Coast, Chile, West Coast, New Zealand, German-speaking,...), but as for me I am happy with wherever the Lord sees fit to send me--I know that it will be where I am supposed to be. I love the Lord, I love the Gospel, I love my spirit brothers and sisters and hope to try my best to serve them and help all those around me to feel of the joys that I know are meant for all children of God. Heavenly Father loves all of His children unconditionally! I am excited to begin a year and a half of hardships, exhaustion, learning, teaching, serving, loving, rejoicing, and all of the other joys that come with teaching of and helping others come closer to Christ and growing closer to him personally.

"Yes, I do randomly burst into song..."

2009-10-05T17:23:00.004-06:00

Ever since I was crib-bound I would make up and sing songs about the world around me. My dreams even come with their own unique soundtracks; sometimes I compose expressive symphonic concertos within that subconscious wonderland. Unfortunately, by the time I return to reality I rarely have more than the left over adrenaline and floating joy from the music drifting away, locking itself in a faraway cabinet of my mind. I do not yet have the musical knowledge or understanding to let my music free, perhaps someday I will. Perhaps in that day I will find that only simple, abstract melodies leak from my pen and not the soul-moving subtleties and bombastic fanfares that occasion my imagination.

Until then I have my goofy songs. Here is a short one from a couple days ago, getting my laundry:

Laundry Basket,
One of the wonders of the world!
Carries my clothes up,
And drops not a sock-let on the floor!

Scary Noises in the Dark

2009-04-27T23:20:00.004-06:00

There was one night a few years ago when my Mother heard a sound from the gully out behind our house. She couldn't figure out what it was. It wasn't a pleasant sound. It wasn't quite a human sound. It was a frightened or pained animal sound. In my mother's concern (it was very very late in the night) she called the police and described the frightful sound the best she could: "A crow the size of a bear!" The police said something like "Ahhh...Yeah, yes of course Ma'am. We will get right on that." Of course by the time an officer went to investigate the mutated crow was nowhere to be heard, but returned not long after the officers left. A friend of my mother's, a hunter, had her call so he could listen to the bizarre noises of the night. She called, the mutated crow cawed, he listened, he laughed hysterically. His experienced ears picked out the sound right away and put it with its originator--a fox.

I still hear my foxes sometimes. (I call them my foxes only because I feel a one-sided friendship with them, I have watched the little ones play in the riverbed, glared at the dogs who chased down their scent during their morning walks, listened to their calls at night) Although the sound makes me gather my kitties inside so they don't get eaten, I feel for the cute little fox family too.

On the same note, I think there might have been bats flying around outside my house this evening. I only guess because I could hear bird-like screech/squeaking. Ah, perhaps it was only a few birds, but bats are so much more mysterious and interesting to be flying around outside one's window. Perhaps it was a newly evolved species of flying rat. Probably was carrying rabies AND the avian flu. I am sure it can also throw lightning bolts from its whiskers when it sneezes.

Or...maybe I happened to eat a little more than half a pizza and the excesses of yummy goodness are adversely affecting my reasoning capabilities. But at least my toes are green and the front lawn is happily mowed! The backyard is being saved for wonderful, sunny tomorrow! Ummm...and a happy Klezmer to you!

VERY rough draft

2009-04-21T20:56:00.008-06:00

When life give you storm clouds

When life gives you rain

When life gives you puddles

Sing, dance, splash, and play!

When wind steals your umbrella

When the thorns tear your sleeve

When dark clouds surround you

Above the storm the sun shines still!

When all friends desert you

When strangers laugh and scorn

When loved ones deceive you

Serve, heal another's heart torn!

When wayward, lost, or fallen

When tears have hope o'ershadowed

When darkness swallows direction

Reach for the scarred Hands once torn and bruised.

When all sun is shining

When storm clouds have passed

When all souls befriend you

Remember the Feet which stood beside you!

When life gives you puddles

When life gives you thorns

When life throws you banana peels

Lift your head and dance with the Sun!

Car, car, SUV, motorcycle, airplane, truck, motorcycle, car...

2009-04-21T16:16:00.007-06:00

This morning when I was driving to school I saw an airplane wing driving the other way. Yes. Airplane wing. Quite an oversized load! It looked like the semi was only going about 20mph with its extra long trailer that still made the wing look like it was wearing flip-flops 2 sizes too small. Toes and heels hanging over the edges. Alas, I didn't have my trusty little camera ready or I would have a lovely picture to post here for you all to enjoy.

That is all :)

Oh. I have made a couple discoveries. All growing up I quite disliked some foods. Pickles, tuna fish, rice pudding, mustard, water chestnuts, oreos and probably a few others. I was however quite fond of other stange things, among them was V8 tomato juice, catfood, and olives (straight from the can) (No, not together! Gross.). I find it incredibly interesting how tastes change over the years. I think that now my tastes have reversed, except in the case of pickles...still not very fond of most pickles. I discovered the other day that I now think rice pudding is delicious, and mustard really does make sandwiches better.

I found myself eating a pre-made deli sandwich and found the taste needing something. A kick, or at least a gentle push. Pepper? no, I didn't feel like I wanted the cough from inhaling pepper flakes that afternoon. Mayo? No, no. Wrong flavor. What do you put on sandwiches.....hmmm. ketchup? uh, no. Not with my turkey, thanks. Mustard? Why not? I got out the costco sized mustard and thankfully remembered to shake it up before I squeezed a little onto my bread...well, "a little" after the initial explosion and rather large glob squirted onto my poor sandwich. I worried that I had ruined it. I spread it around. Tasted it. Hey! Not bad! Hahaha! I thought I never would like mustard, it was disgusting after all.

Okay, that is all now :)

It is a gloriously beautiful day and I am going to go do some weeding while the sun is out (I am deficient in Vitamin D). I will soon write about New York adventures, an excellent Italian restaurant, and some other unbearably exciting things!

Smile and be happy! There is no better way to spend life's rainy days than by singing, dancing, and splashing through the puddles!

(an unfinished post outline)

2008-12-04T16:09:00.004-07:00

-last institute classes for the semester this week--what wonderful classes and teachers!! taught with hope, so grateful for them

Broken Record

2008-12-03T10:18:00.005-07:00

Alright, so it is Monday! Monday night = Family Home Evening Night! So I am headed to my church to join in happy social activities (I think that night was a movie night). All's well, it is dark (yes it gets dark by like 6pm in the winter times-crazy I know) and I am driving along the highway blasting whatever classical tunes happened to be on the radio. I hum along absent-mindedly as my brain goes on auto-pilot--I have driven this route a few hundred times over the past couple years.

Hum, hummmm, humming....blin-ker, blin-ker, blin-ker (to the beat), humm, glance at the pretty horses, humm-new song, watch the cars go by, see sneaky police car catching speeders in the usual spot-smile-check spedometer even though I wasn't speeding in the first place, hummmm, notice roadkill got picked up, humhum ...blueredblueredblue... hmmuuh?

I snap out of my auto-pilot zone, something is different. Blueredblue...oh. I blink in suprise then I pull over, turn off my car and wait. A nice officer walks cautiously up to my car (I guess I shouldn't have left my window all the way down?) and politely informs me that I had a headlight out. I did? I knew it was on its deathbed but I didn't know the grave was so close. I apologized and thanked the officer for letting me know, my words sort of stammering around...I felt a little like a goldfish just opening and closing its mouth with a deer-in-the-headlights look. The officer was very kind and didn't give me a ticket, just let me on my way. I was very grateful.

On my way back home from the church it was quite a bit darker, and I was quite a bit more paranoid of getting pulled over again because of my now known headlight violation. I stucked in my courage and headed back the way I came. I got closer to my halfway-home point (where I got pulled over) being even more cautious of speed limits than normal. I passed the place where I was stopped a few hours earlier. Maybe a quarter mile later I saw another hidden police car veer out into traffic a few cars behind me. It didn't have its lights flashing-yet-but I had a feeling it was coming for me. I slowed down to let him catch up as he tried to manuver around the stubborn cars between us. I sighed as he got closer and blueredblueredbluered flashed in my mirrors, pulled over and waited as before. The officer got out of his car and got about halfway to my window, paused, then, "I'm really not stalking you...it's just a slow night." I laughed as he explained that he had just been sitting and pulling over burnt out headlights and we exchanged farewell's of "have a good night" and "drive safe"'s and went out ways again. I needed a smile that night and that is what I got. Needless to say I was less paranoid of getting pulled over the rest of the way home.

I had never been pulled over before, then I got pulled over twice in the space of a few hours! There goes my life goal of being able to go into a criminal background check with a clean slate. At least now I can say that my slate has character now. It is a happy character at that. How many people can say that being pulled over brightened their day?

Oh Snap!

2008-10-02T17:57:00.002-06:00

Today was just one of those days. You know. When you've been under a little bit of stress for a while and haven't done much other than homework and attending classes. I think a person's psyche can only handle so much of that, snapping is inevitable. I snapped today in band. Someone did something goofy that only warranted a chuckle at most. My psyche snapped. I couldn't stop laughing no matter how I tried (when I would stop for a second, my awesome bass clarinet friend would still be laughing and get me laughing again, then I would get her laughing again...what a vicious cycle.). I must have been on the verge of turning purple for trying to keep my incessant giggling silent I think it must be yet another sign of my need for a padded room.

I remember another inconvenient time that I snapped. I was in a spiritual Sunday School-Relief Society lesson not terribly long after a slue of AP tests and school finals and a sweet sweet lady's tummy rumbled and my tummy squealed in answer, and my mother's and a couple other lady's tummies grumbled and squeaked in reply. It was like a gastrointestinal choir. Something inside my mind snapped, I tried my hardest to stop laughing, but I ended up having to get up and leave the room. I was sitting on the first or second row.

I am glad that Bass Clarinet parts tend to have more rests because it took me a while, all of my focusing abilities, and lots of tongue biting to regain any semblance of composure.

Someone's Grandpa

2008-09-06T00:09:00.003-06:00

So, I have finished up my second week of school. Huzzah! I am so grateful for all of the incredible opportunities that come my way. I have a pretty homework heavy set of credit hours this semester and it has kept me pretty busy from writing papers, revising papers, memorizing music, playing music, learning new instruments (especially when I get a ligature...), chemistry labs (two already!), lab reports, reading Thoreau in mad frenzies, extra anatomy SI sessions, a marching band...er football game already, uniform committee organization/help, lots of fun and exciting things...

Speaking of exciting things, my radiator in my car even decided to asplode one morning while I drove in circles parking-spot hunting; for which I am grateful because it helped me re-realize how many extremely kind, considerate, and unselfish people there are all around me. The story is off topic but I wish to share anyway because it is happy and makes me feel happy and loved.

As afore-stated I was driving around a couple of parking lots last Wednesday morning (last week, not two days ago Wednesday), which is pretty much futile due to the fact that no one can ever find any parking after say 8:30am on Wednesday mornings anywhere where you need them to be, and was driving my circles over and over through "my" lots waiting patiently for an opening somewhere. I had my windows down (my car's AC) and thought I could smell something strange but couldn't put my finger on it so it slipped my mind, or just waited in a secluded back corner of my mind for its number to be called again.

At one point I glanced down at my gauges/various -ometers and saw that my engine temperature was just starting to get above normal. Nothing to be alarmed about yet, but I decided to exit the packed parking lot I was about halfway through at the time and make my way a few blocks to the Dee Events Center (which has a huge parking lot) and park my car to let it cool down a while. Not two seconds had passed after I had completed my thought when white billowy clouds of steam started streaming, then gushing from under my hood. I blinked, my mind said "Oh my...," and I stopped and turned off the car. In the middle of the driving lane of the lot. I popped my hood and got out to survey my poor car and found that there was too much hot HOT steam to try opening my hood and that there was lovely fluid creating a pond-lake under my car and running down the parking lot. I blinked again with my hands on my hips and my mind said, "Oooooh my. Definitely not a good sign."

I must have had quite the bewildered/lost/utterly flabbergasted look on my face (and I know that I was being watched over carefully and lovingly) because not 45 seconds had passed and one kind lady came to my aid, calling and asking advice of her husband (while I stood by (my hands still on my hips just watching the pond under my car grow...sort of speechless like) like I had just been hit heartily in the head with a frozen trout....as dazed as I would have been concussed). Then another person, a man who worked at a nearby building came by to help, and a couple whose car was parked just next to mine who left and they all helped me push my car back and into their spot so it wasn't in the driving lane. I was so very grateful to all of them and was overwhelmed with the knowledge that I could not deny that I was loved and known and being cared about and watched over.

The man who worked at a nearby building ended up helping me fill up my radiator with water (mainly from the pile of water bottles that gathered in my car), followed me to the car shop and drove me back to campus (I made it to my next class on time even!). What a sweet sweet person! I thanked him a hundred times. He even offered a ride back to the car shop if I needed it, but I told him I would be in class until that evening and thanked him again.

I did have to get a new radiator and belt but I am so grateful for the experience as a bit of awakening to me on how much my Heavenly Father does know me and love me personally. I was completely at a loss on what to do and He sent some of the kindest people my way. It filled me with gratitude and I hope that I can be a helping tool for my Heavenly Father and gain more of that kind of charity and find places to serve.

Back to topic. Wait, I haven't really introduced my topic as of yet. Hmmm. Onto the next topic then! The topic I meant to write about! Yay! Okay, getting on with it.

I have been thinking of doing a Pre-Pharmacy major (though I would very much love to do music as well) and have been taking those related courses. I am taking Human Anatomy as one of such courses this semester and with that class comes a lab. I took a medical terminology class and absolutely loved it and found it to be quite a neat class. Anatomy and Physiology (possibly a little more on the latter) seem to just be fascinating and I am excited for them. I am excited and grateful for our extraordinary labs as well, just trying to get over the initial shock factor of the nature of it.

We are very lucky to be able to have the use of human cadavers to learn from. My professor told of how he went to very large universities and they only had rubber models in their labs to learn from. We are indeed very blessed to have such an honor and opportunity. I had to keep telling myself that until I finally believed it after we went over the safety precautions about the fumes and having the utmost respect for the cadavers. For a long while (even a little now still) I just didn't know what to think about it; right, wrong, fear, apprehension, dread, curiosity, guilt, discomfort, overwhelming, ignorance, questioning, excitement, awkwardness, interest, disgust, respect, gratitude, stress. So many differing and conflicting feelings, but I have come out so far with an overriding knowledge that this is indeed an incredible blessing and learning experience.

My first lab class was this morning and mostly all we did was go over the terms from the manual and "meet" our cadaver. I love our instructors for their upbeat attitudes and calming, happy countenances. As much as you can try to prepare yourself for such an experience, the initial shock of actually being there and experiencing things will always remain. As our lab instructor got ready to introduce us to our cadaver she reminded us about keeping the utmost respect and that our cadaver was someone's grandpa.

I am sure it will take sometime for me to get over the emotional and psychological shocks of this lab work, but I must learn to separate that part of me and allow myself to use this incredible opportunity to learn all that I can and be grateful for someone's grandpa and his family who allowed me to learn so much from his gift.

(p.s. I have 7 back-post drafts that I am still working on... they will be coming soon!)

Back to School and such (quite the pathetic draft of a post...if I say so myself. vey unfinished)

2008-08-29T18:38:00.004-06:00

So I fell a little behind again on updating my lovely blog. I did end up getting a temporary job as an Office Clerk at the AG's office where I bates stamped a few thousand documents

Unfinished....a taste of what might be a Sentimental mood (draft again)

2008-06-18T18:40:00.005-06:00

My heart resides in dreams
sprung from hopes of yesteryear
walls built up from reality
until one Brave hope draws near

Joyous dances in moonshine's beam
through meadows of downy glee
freedom and clarity in starlight's gleam
Courage's arms warm about me there

Cold Morning slaps my face
sharp sight dispels my soft Vision
yet twinkling smiles a' frolic
in remembrance of that place

What to linger in Dreams embrace
ne'er to wake in lost love's tears
alas Dawn chases always for Moon
left to love across a crowded space

Silver and Gold (An unfinished draft...someday I may finish it...my outline included at the end)

2008-06-06T10:38:00.004-06:00

We adopted a cat who was abandoned by a neighbor who moved away a number of years ago. My brother decided to name her Silver, why 'Silver' I still don't know. She is quite a pretty cat: long fur, calico, and the cutest huge white paws. She is also one of the more affectionate cats you'd meet, she wasn't very fond of other cats, but she just erupted into a thunderstorm of purring if you just glanced her way. She loves attention. She knows her name and meows back anytime you talk to her. She adopted an empty flower pot to sleep among the flowers and a friend of mine called her her little Silver Flower and the name always stuck in my mind.

As she grew older she became predominantly an outside cat except for cooler winters and lonely nights. She grew older again and needed more help upkeeping her masses of fur, I brushed her as often as I could, she melted at my attentions as I tried to help her feel pretty again. Time went on, she got older, her health started on a downhill. We made her a special bed when she had a lonely night and wanted to sleep inside. She remained my Silver Flower and spent most of her time sleeping in her flower pot amongst the flowers. She went missing from her favorite places and I found her not long after, gone quietly away to pass on. She now sleeps amongst flowers more beautiful than any on this earth and never has to worry about tangles in her fur or feeling lonely, never again to have ill health. I imagine her still as my Silver Flower, napping away in her own special flower pot in the clouds.

A Saturday not long before, I was cleaning/practicing and taking the occasional peek at "Little Mama" my little bird friend watching over her baby eggs. About a half hour had gone by since I had last peeked out the window, I heard a thump outside near the front porch and went to investigate. When I opened the door I saw the wreath that my little finches had nested on had fallen to the ground. I looked around and when I saw no culprit I picked it up and checked the nest. One, two, three, four...all the tiny blue speckled eggs were safe and sound. Relieved, I carefully placed the wreath back up on its nail and went inside to the window and waited for Little Mama to return. She did, hopped around a bit and settled in after giving me a wary and suspicious look. I told her she needn't worry about me, that I would help her protect her nest and her babies. I left the window and my little friend and returned to my Saturday activities.

An hour or two later I heard another thump. I must have been busy with practicing or something because it took a little while for the 'thump''s meaning to process in my mind. When it finally clicked I went out to check on the little nest, first through the window. The wreath had again fallen. I went out and hurriedly picked it up for examination. The nest was empty. I looked all over the porch for the tiny speckled eggs. The porch was clean. I looked again in the nest hoping beyond hope that they might have magically returned to their place. It was empty. I could see my little friend sitting in the nearby tree chiding me so I reluctantly put the wreath back up with its empty nest. I looked around again and saw no sign of the sweet little eggs anywhere. I went back inside and to the window. Little Mama flew back to her nest and my heart broke as she hopped around and cocked her head at all angles looking for her soon-to-be-babies. She looked at me again, but this time almost seeming confused and questioning. I had failed her, I took too long to save the wreath, her nest, and her babies from whatever had desecrated it. She flew off chirping and returned a few minutes later with Little Papa, who I had never seen before then. They both took turns hopping around their empty nest, cocking their heads every which way, chirping to each other, sitting where their eggs should have been only to hop back up in despair. My heart broke again as they would sit in their empty nest for a few minutes longer, searching a few minutes longer, fly back to their tree or the roof and come back chirping, looking sadly to me and each other and their empty nest. I couldn't help but feel that I might have been able to save their babies if only I had come faster, if only I had watched longer, if only... After a couple hours of searching and flying from tree to tree to roof to nest to tree they went away and I never saw them return to the nest.

Weeks later these stories and the memories of other sad times all came back to me as a good sized spider gave me a fright. I am usually not bothered by the creepy crawly bugs much, but this time I couldn't bring myself the courage to even catch it and set it free outside.

finding Silver....finding charly...heart broken little mamma...jumping spider (couldn't smash, innocent, prayed to go away, ...break down... tofu not catch it...let it get out of sight......... found more info=all better (blessed with comfort!)) always comforted, so grateful

Job Safari - Cause Hunting Isn't My Thing

2008-05-15T11:51:00.003-06:00

So it is summah time, and the weather is high, la da da da da, do de da dea doy...
Nevermind, you probably don't know that song, and I don't know the rest of the words anywho. :)

Anyway, it is summertime, well May time, and I am once again job searching! Oh the excitement! I was thinking about getting trained and being a phlebotomist, but there doesn't seem to be any openings at the moment.

Then I was thinking about being a teller at a bank/credit union (because one of my brothers is one and it seems like a good, fun job), or being a Pharmacy Tech somewhere (but of course I would need to first get trained/certified as one), or maybe working at a bookstore (because I quite enjoy books), or at a greenhouse/nursery (I love plants and being outside for a job would be awesome), or a chocolate/candy shop (...no reason needed), or one of the popular fruit smoothie franchises, or one of the widespread bread bakeries.....

Those are the ones on my mind at the moment. I would love to work any of these jobs (as well as a number others I am sure), but me being my indecisive and over-analyzing self.... We can just say that it is difficult.

I will keep you updated.

And yes, that is just a random picture. :)

A Little Catsup with my Fried Taters

2008-04-28T03:20:00.009-06:00

-ice skating class!
-phone still works!
-played first part and not kicked out of band!
-rainrainrain, snowsnowsnow, beesbeesweedingbees, little Mama!
-it's like Christmas!! ...many times per week

So that is what the draft of this post looked like, I will try to piece together what exactly I was thinking, but as to fitting the title in....I am not too sure where that one came from.

-ice skating class!
I took an Ice Skating class at the Ice sheet on my campus this last semester and I loved it! We had an amazing teacher who was not only a fantastic skater but just one of those who is very talented in teaching what he knows and helping others to improve. I had a blast learning new techniques and "basic" skills.

As part of our grade we had to buy a public skate punch pass to go and practice what we learned outside of class time. Some of the times I went in the evenings when all of the dating/scouting/church/party/family groups of people swarmed the rink and you had just enough room to follow the mob counter-clockwise around the rink and around and around again. Other times I would go during the day (if my band class was canceled or something) and there would only be a handful of people there, most of them practicing for an upcoming competition or show or something I would imagine. I was in awe at their expertise in comparison to my own "basic" skills. I was always excited to practice the new things I had learned in class, but sometimes my shaky three-turns looked a little silly against another fellow practicer's beautiful lay-back spin; or my bruising crash landing after attempting a couple lunges would redden my face more than my purple knees as I would watch them practice a toe-loop or lutz. I did feel a little silly practicing with those whose talents were far more worked and perfected than mine but I enjoyed every minute of it. I laughed at myself and watched others in wonder. I gained a whole new appreciation for skaters of all kinds (hockey, figure, speed,..) and my love for skating only grew.

-phone still works!
As for my poor phone. I have had my phone for a good while cell-phone-wise am I am very grateful to have one. I am also grateful to have a nice warm jacket, also one that I have had for a long while (a longer while than that of my phone). My poor jacket's pockets are starting to come unstitched a little...well okay, the one pocket only has three of the three and a half sides still stitched in place (I haven't quite gotten around to fixing it, but it's on the to-do list).

I was doing some cleaning not too long ago and wearing said jacket with my phone in the aforementioned pocket of that jacket. I was cleaning the bathroom and had cleaned the vanity, the mirrors, and scrubbed the toilet 'til it sparkled nicely. I was working on the floors and bent over to pick something up off the floor and heard a dreadful splash near my head. I glanced over and lo! My poor phone slid out of my broken pocket into my glittering-clean toilet! NO!! How many times had I told my phone to fight its urges and desires to test its imaginary wings and fly to freedom?? Well, none, but it should have known better than to try its hand at swimming. Phones don't come installed with floaties and therefore should never be trusted in a lifeguarding post--they sink like an anvil.

I fished my phone out (with only a little hesitation...I had just cleaned the toilet!!), shook it violently until my arms were sore to get as much water out as I could, and let it open to dry overnight. Luckily I was blessed to have not damaged it too much for in the morning when I put the battery back in and turned it on it worked! Happy day when phones get brought back from near drowning experiences!! It has been slightly more temperamental since and I think I might have to get a new phone sometime soon, but hooray for still having a working phone! I now try to keep things in more secure pockets.

-played first part and not kicked out of band!
Well, that one speaks for itself I think. My band director decided last semester to put me on first-solo part in our Symphonic Band with a great solo clarinet player (so we were both covering the parts). He said he wanted to give me the opportunity, and I said I am happy to play any part he gives me. Oh my. I had never played solo-solos in a concert before! It was tons of fun and I enjoyed it greatly. We played all of Johan DeMeij's Lord of the Rings Symphony and a handful of other fun pieces and I wasn't booed off the stage for my one or two little solos. YAY! I had great fun.

-rainrainrain, snowsnowsnow, beesbeesweedingbees, little Mama!
Hmmmm. Oh yeah. So it was quiet an interesting spring this year. I live in a desert so one might think it would often be quite dry and warm by end of April-May-ish. Not so much. I don't think we have had many whole weeks where we have gone without a rainstorm or two. One day it was sunny and very much warm and the next day or two it then cooled forty degrees and rained and snowed on the Spring Daffodils! It even snowed on the first of May! It seems like we have had a good batch of rainstorms this spring season, and I love it!! I love the rain, I love the snow, I love the sunshine, ...I love it all!!

So, one of those warmer days I was weeding. Pulling out dandelions and grass and such out of the garden. There was one particularly thick bunch of dandelions which I noticed must have been quite the party place for all the honeybees around. I avoided weeding around their corner, but then had the urge to go get my camera and play. I had much fun...

My brother also discovered a little bird had made its nest atop a wreath on their front porch, every time anyone would go out the front door the poor little bird would fly off and chide us in her sweet, sing-song voice from a nearby tree and almost make us jump out of our shoes in surprise. A few times I even reminded myself before I went out that the bird was there and would surprise me when I opened the door, but still, every time, I jumped. I looked one day in her nest and found she had four little speckled eggs! I took up watching her from the kitchen window that looks on the front porch. I looked her up on bird watching sites and found that she was a sweet little house finch. I called her Little Mama and we became friends (at least from my side) and I think sometimes she trusted me enough to let me sit out on the porch to read when the sun was out...if I stayed still for the most part.

-it's like Christmas!! ...many times per week
Or maybe its just like Christmas everyday! Whenever someone gets something cool in the mail (anything besides mailers and bills and such), gets something fun from the store, finds something they lost, just has a happy day, does something fun, gets something cleaned (like a car or room or pet), or for no reason at all except for being happy...."It's like Christmas!" My brother and sister more or less told me that it is apparently Christmas everyday according to me. Fine by me! Happy day!!

Onomatopoeia!!

2008-02-27T23:17:00.004-07:00

My brother told me that when I tell him stories my regular use of onomatopoeias makes him laugh. I hadn't noticed my use of such exciting language until he mentioned it which in turn made me laugh.

After church one Sunday (it had been sunny for a few days and somewhat warm for winter) I was happily surprised to find an inch or two of slush snow to scrape off my car. I loved it. It was the kind of slush that makes glorious schlopping sounds when you step in it and just solid enough not to get one's feet terribly wet when trekking across parking lots. I successfully cleared my car and went on my way out of the parking lot as the sky half-heartedly rain-hailed.

I got to the road in front of my church and found that the roads too were wet and delightfully slushy so I drove slowly towards the hill I had to venture down to be on my way home. A couple of cars came up the hill headed the the other direction and I paid them no real heed until they were even with me. They were driving quite a bit faster than I was and slush was spraying out from their tires...."SLUSH!" Most of my windshield was covered in the opaque sloppy mess and just the noise it made when it hit nearly had me jump out of my shoes. Luckily my windshield wipers were already on and wiped it away, and by the time it had and when my shoes recovered from being jumped out of, I couldn't help but laugh. The familiar image of someone waiting under umbrella at a bus stop in the rain only to be splashed unsuspectingly by a passing car (in the movies often by a marvelously huge tidal wave of a splash) and left standing, dripping wet, umbrella blown uselessly inside-out by the blow...

I continued on my way home in the on-off rain-snow. About the halfway mark it started snowing full on and the snowflakes kept growing and growing. At their peak, they were the biggest snowflakes I had ever seen in my life and you could hear their soft "plump" when they hit my windshield and left palm sized splotches of snowflake (huge cookie size is the way I explained it at the time). I was in awe and grinning like a goon the whole time. I love snowflakes. I wanted to turn back around and just pull over on the side of the highway to just watch, but my family dinner called to my tummy and that was still another hours drive away after I got home. I left my snowflakes as I turned the corner onto another highway and within two minutes it had stopped snowing and I believe the sun even came out before it started raining again.

I told my brother my story excitedly while on our way to said family dinner (with probably a few more onomatopoeias than I can remember now) and we laughed. I had never before noticed I made such good use of such exciting language until it was pointed out. We then laughed about how "abbreviation" is such a long word, and asked why onomatopoeia isn't its namesake. I then decided is should be, so, onomatopoeia became an onomatopoeia. And there was much onomatopoeia-ing.

Until next time, consider yourself thoroughly onomatopoeiaed.

12-10-2007

2007-12-10T20:01:00.000-07:00

IT SNOWED!!! And snowed, and is snowing some more! Happy happy birthday present. :D

More coming soon!

Finals are Imminent

2007-12-04T16:09:00.000-07:00

Sorry friends! This semester has eaten me up and I've not gotten around to posting. ...but the semester is almost over!! YAY! I've got plenty of finals, presentations, papers, concerts, pep band games, and rehearsals to keep me plenty busy the next couple weeks, but after that I get to have my wonderful Winter Break! I am excited.

I really don't have time to post much of anything at the moment (I should be finishing up a few papers and things), but I just wanted to make it known that I haven't quite fallen off the edge of the earth. I still have a few fingertips topside.

Summer Randoms

2007-05-19T12:44:00.000-06:00

Hello and Summer's Greetings! I had written of a new post a little while ago, but it seems to have gotten eaten. So sad. I don't even remember what it was about either. Instead of backtracking to past weeks', I am just going to start with this week and will probably review past missed stories at a latter time.

So, things that have made me happy. In list format because I am feeling too lazy to connect everything all together in some sort of logical fashion.

-At the moment I am listening to some Eric Whitacre pieces I have played in band (one of my favorite composers, you should all definitely go to his site and take a few minutes to listen to the samples of his songs).

-I have been on a bit of a cleaning kick this week (kicks earn me title of "White Tornado" from my Mother) and have half cleaned the monstrosity that has been my room (sadly neglected during the school year), cleaned/organized random spots around the house, done many loads of laundry, helped to clean my church, and will mow our lawn as soon as we get more gasoline for it (hopefully later today). Cleaning...er, when things are clean I feel happy inside, and accomplished if I helped to do the cleaning.

-I got to go see my little brother's Jazz band concert (he is in my old, awesome high school band program now), and he did awesome! I need to join the Jazz band at my school, the music just makes me happy, like an adrenalin rush. I also got to see one of my best friends and talk with my Junior High German Teacher. I had decided in high school that was a requirement for all German teachers to simply just be awesome. All of mine have been teachers and amazing people.

-I went with some other best friends of mine (who I haven't been able to talk with much because of school) to a young people's activity and got to talk with them for a while and have all sorts of fun.

-I donated blood for the first time ever on Thursday, it was SO FUN, and SO COOL! I had a really good phlebotomist and got to talk with her about her job and other things. (such as how I don't mind blood too much and other things....like how the nurses/dermatologist all thought I was a little strange for being fascinated with watching my skin change colors as it froze and thawed (I had a wart frozen off)) She ended up telling me that I should become a doctor or something and that she had a doctor who was like me (fascinated by things others might see as morbid). I am thinking about doing Phlebotomy as a part time job.

-I was interviewed on Friday for a temporary summer-long job at my Mom's office and was told that they thought I sounded perfect for the job and want me to start next Tuesday. I am still deciding, but I will probably take the job. The Attorney who interviewed me also that I had "an impressive resume for being such a young lady." Wow! That would be a confidence booster.

-I also got to spend that day at work with my Mom (well, it was her half day...so not the whole day) where I went a little crazy and spent about a half an hour sitting under her desk...as her desk troll. I don't even think one of her co-workers, who walked around her desk to try to help with some thing, even noticed I was there. hehehe I should have made troll noises. Later we got to go to lunch with my sister and her fiance at a "hippy vegetarian/raw" place. It was really yummy. Mmmmm Curry. I love my family. I decided that we need to do more stuff as a family together.

-After we went to lunch my Mom and I went to my Jeanie's (we don't call her grandma, she is just Jeanie, because she just isn't a grandma) and helped her with a couple things and talked with her. I am so lucky to have a Jeanie. I love her so much. (don't worry Mom, I love you so much, too! I am excited to work at your office with you ever the summer!)

I think that is all for now. More to come soon!

-the BandNeeek

I'm a Chuggin Along...still

2007-04-25T19:00:00.000-06:00

Still working on getting caught up with this...finals are next week (and this week) so after then I will really be able to sprint back up to gear.

Woah! Rewind!

2007-04-11T18:43:00.000-06:00

I have not posted in ...a long while, but never fear! I haven't been eaten by the fathomless monster that is schoolwork or brainwashed by the lazy dust bunnies inside my pillow. Well, maybe just a little. A nibble here and a splosh there, nothing an extra Spring Break wouldn't fix (but seeing as extra breaks have been outlawed, I will just have to wait a few more weeks until after finals are done and over with). All is well that ends in Summer break!

So. Happy things. There are many. It has been sunny and warm, and now it is about to rain and snow and be cold for a few days. Both for me are happy.

I ate way too much Easter candy on Easter. I was bouncing off the walls so much I think my family wanted to disown me for a while. hehehe It doesn't help that I haven't been getting to bed as early as I should and missed hours of sleep pile on. And make me even more giddy. It has been fun on my side of things though. Most everything seems funny if you have sufficiently tilted your circadian cycle and added grotesque amounts of sugar to your diet. Not recommended for long term use.

Oh, yes. Easter. Easter was wonderful! My Mom taught my brother and I how to make deviled eggs, which is quite fun, and made us try one when we had finished. I don't think I have ever enjoyed eating hard-boiled eggs, but these weren't so bad. Nevertheless, one is enough for me. We got to spend much of the day with our family, eating, playing, talking, and generally enjoying the day (after church, of course, which was also wonderful). I ended up crashing early-ish in the evening because of all the sugar I ate and all the energy I expended because of it, but I thoroughly enjoyed my day.

This week has been good, too. We are playing a few fun songs in band and I am still getting used to the new mouthpieces that our band director bought the whole clarinet section (not ours to keep unless we buy them from him). We have had a couple fun sectionals, one in which I ended up being silly and bending notes. Another clarinet friend of mine wanted me to teach her how, so I tried my best (I am not terribly amazing at it myself, but I have fun). She thinks it sounds like a kitty mewing, which had us all giggling.

Speaking of kitties, we took my kitty to the vet on Saturday because he has been acting not so happy lately. He wasn't happy about going, but we wrapped him up in a towel and covered his head and he was just fine. The doctor said he looked great, besides needing to lose a couple few pounds (he weighed in at 15.9 pounds...eek), but took some blood tests to make sure everything was alright. We called back Monday for the results and they came back normal! I was so relieved. We have him on diet food so he should slim down a bit over the next while. I will have to update you on the weekends or something so you too can watch his dieting (I know, so exciting for you).

Alright. I think that is enough for today. I will post more soon! Stay Happy!

-the BandNeeek

P.S. I have a whole handful of posts that I haven't quite finished. I will finish them soon and post them up! Keep an eye out. :)

Happy March!

2007-03-01T20:07:00.000-07:00

The first days of March are notorious for coming in as either a Lion or Lamb. While both are soft and furry their images carry significant discrepancies on first impressions. We are taught fear towards Lions because of their ruthless, violent, and bloodthirsty nature; whereas we are taught to love the Lamb because of its helplessness, soft and pure wool, and quiet dispositions. I can't help but smirk, perhaps because I am just a silly person who finds many things in life humorous, or perhaps because I have watched my share of "Nature" episodes.

Lions can be violent and ruthless when thoroughly provoked or starved, but isn't the same true with all creatures (including all of us, as humans, and our lovely friend the lamb)? Haven't we all poked at a sibling until they exploded back at you, or gone a too-busy day without time to eat and found yourself snapping at your peers for trivial matters? Put a mane, tail, sharp teeth, and claws on us and hear us roar! Have you ever watched a litter of puppies, or a couple baby lambs romp around on their awkward legs? They can have all the fun in the world, but if you try to take my food or pounce on me one too many times, you'd better watch out!

Lions, like most other members of the feline family, spend most of their lives not roaring and tearing things to shreds, but sleeping. They sleep up to 20 hours per day and often only wake to quell their rumbling stomachs. Roaring might also be the human equivalent of screaming (in pain, frustration, fear, etc.), and in most cases one doesn't normally hear grown people scream all too often. There is not a need to, and if we did scream constantly we would end up in a "boy who cried wolf" predicament. Who would listen when we really needed help? Lions act much in the same way, only roaring in the most trying circumstances.

I am not an expert on infants whether they be human or animal, but I have been around a few in my life. The first thing that comes to mind when the thought of a "baby" pops up is the crying. It seems that for some babies they are either crying or sleeping (which is an obviously exaggerated comment to fit my purposes...I really do love babies!). They cry when they are hungry, tired, frustrated, scared, alone, with company, bored, or any other reason, it is one of the only things they know how to do instinctively to get what they want/need. I wouldn't think lambs are any different from kittens, puppies, chicks, or infants.

It is true that Lions can be fearsome if you ever catch on while it's awake, and Lambs can be quiet and docile if you can sneak up on it while it is sleeping, but then again maybe I just like to cheer for the underdog.

Either way, March came roaring in with a beautiful, fluffy snow storm!

Have a Fabulous day!

-The BandNeeek

Happy February! (for the last time this year)

2007-02-28T19:05:00.000-07:00

I will fill this space with some of my humorous band moments/quotes I have collected.

Daily Practice Schedule written on the board...sometimes r's and n's look alike.
"12:00 Carmina Burana--shift seating (rotating pants)"

On Brass players:
"It's too early", "It's too late", "It's too cold", "It's too hot", "My lip is split", "My valve/slide is stuck/sticky", "I have to empty my spit valve", "Wrong Partial", "My mute slipped", "I don't have my mute", "Huh?"

On Wind players:
"It's the reed (new, old, hard, soft, etc.)", "My instrument has a leak", "My cork needs replacing", "Do you have any cork grease?", "My other (better) instrument is in the shop", "Don't look/laugh at the brass players, it only encourages them", "I can't play: I just ate", "Do you all keep your toothbrushes/toothpaste there (a cabinet in the band room...above the sink)?"

"The Clarinet section is the Heart of any band." -Current Band Director

"You have to play this like you are a mad lady in church!" -Former Band Director

...more to come soon!

-the BandNeeek

Asploxon!

2007-02-27T17:25:00.000-07:00

Yup, a-s-p-l-o-x-o-n. I decided one day in my Chemistry class that I wanted to spell 'asplotion ("Your head asplode"-Strongbad...go to homestarrunner, it gives your laughing muscles a workout) with an "x." Asploxon (pronounced explosion, or asplosion, whichever you prefer) was the outcome in the side column next to my titration notes (or was it molality? I don't remember).

So, why the sudden asploxon? It started with my helping to make Sunday dinner, well, dessert anyway. My mission was to make a delicious poppy seed bundt cake (with my help from a lovely store-bought cake mix, a few eggs, a splash of vegetable oil, and some pudding mix). All I had to do was dump everything together, mix, grease, pour, and bake. Sometimes things are easier said than done. Especially when one has too much sugar in her system and has too much energy to simply stand still.

I learned a new lesson that Sunday: Always open cake mixes with scissors, even if you do think you are the incredible hulk (or that's who your Mother says you are impersonating). I ended up losing a bit of the mix all over me, the counter top, and the floor, but luckily not enough to ruin the cake. I made myself hungry every time I got a whiff of my yellow-cake perfume.

The cake turned out fine and quite yummy, but while I wasn't busy with said cake mix I decided I would help my Mother crack some nuts we had left over from Christmas (I wasn't eating them, but she had had one or two before I came to "help"). Needless to say I was in a bit of a bouncy mood that whole day, or maybe asploxon would be more accurate? With nutcracker and pecan, cashew, or almond in hand I shelled a few random nuts (which could have almost been categorized as artillery blasts; my sinister laughs followed by a crack and flying nutshells all through the kitchen). I picked up nut after nut, always asking "Do you want one of these Mom?" or "What's this one Mom?"

I picked up one, small, round, acorn-ish shaped nut and asked what kind of nut it was. "Um..." said my Mom as she looked up. "I think it is a ...? No, I am not sure..."
"Is it a hazelnut?"
"No, not a hazelnut."
"Macadamia, Macadamia!! Ooo! I know! It's a Heckleberry!" said I in my asploxon-mood voice with my giggles and laughs sure to follow.
"There's no such thing as a Heckleberry, BandNeeek." (no, my Mom doesn't really call me BandNeeek)
"Sure there is! That's a Heckleberry!"

I like to make up words if you haven't noticed. It could be considered a favorite past time of mine if you like. Anyway, I continued making a mess (in the just cleaned kitchen might I add) and my Mom kept trying to get me to stop (she didn't want to eat them anymore, and wanted my mess to stop growing...I was picking most of it up as I went...teehee). After a few more minutes I stopped my cracking rampage and we picked up the rest of the prodigal shells.
"Oh, I know what it is!" cried my wise Mother. "It's a Filbert!"
"I still think it's a Heckleberry," replied my goofy self.

Sunday night we got dumped on. By snow. And my brother, sister-in-law, and I all had to drive back up to their home that night in the middle of it. I loved it! We headed out around 10-10:30 , I loaded my stuff in my car, and they in theirs. I started sweeping the 4+ inches snow off my car and found as soon as I had gone all the way around I had to start over again as I found another thick layer of snow on all my windows. I went around 3 or 4 times before I gave up and hoped in. I was covered with snow just as my car was, especially my hair (I love having snow in my hair and eyelashes...it is one of the many things on my "what makes me happy" list).

The snowplows hadn't gotten anywhere in my city yet (there was close to 6 inches on the roads/freeway) and I was doing pretty well for not having much experience with such conditions. I made it up a nasty little hill, around a few turns, and down a couple not quite as nasty hills without sliding much at all.

Then there was the stoplight. I was far back enough that I had to stop, so I pressed the brakes gently, but I was also coming from the bottom of a hill. I slowed, but I slid a few feet to the side and stopped just before hitting the curb. Cool! My wheels spun a little as I got back into my lane (my brother and sister following behind) and I continued my cautious, crawling pace down the road even more cautiously. As we got closer to the freeway my brother called and we decided it would be best for my sister to drive my car the rest of the way. Fine by me! I like to drive in the snow, but only if there aren't many things close around that I could slide in to.

We didn't see the snowplows until we were through the next city on the freeway, by which time the snow wasn't falling as hard and the roads were merely wet and only a little slushy as opposed to buried in a half of a foot of snow. Silly plows. They stayed in front of us (all six of them) plowing the roads already in better condition, but I was grateful for them nonetheless. I am sure they kept the wet roads from turning to an ice sheet overnight.

We got another storm early this morning (Tuesday), but the roads weren't quite as bad. Still unplowed when I left for school, but not as bad. I saw a few Highway patrol/county sheriff/city police stopped with a few cars off the road and only one ambulance (I saw another and a fire engine on the way home though...every time I see an emergency vehicle I want to climb aboard, ride along, learn, and help people! But if I ever did I would probably be arrested and get a restraining order on all vehicles with flashing lights and sirens...Ack! There I go getting distracted again.) the whole drive. I am glad that there weren't any serious accidents, a happy surprise for me.

So, a happy summary: cake mixes, nutshells, and clouds (with added hyperness) make joyous asploxons and big messes. Stay safe and cautious! Catch a snowflake, raindrop, or a ray of sunlight on your tongue today. Savour it, you never know how long it might take to get another.

-The BandNeeek

Tie Thursday!

2007-02-22T18:07:00.000-07:00

Shake up the hat...close eyes....pull out slip of paper....
"And the subject of this weeks' Tie Thursday is....silly T-shirts!"

In one of my classes today I was the first girl in the class with about 5 or so other boys until others showed up about 10 minutes later. The teacher (also male) asked me "Hey, BandNeeek, where is your posse today?"
I laughed as I am often one of the quietest students in all my classes, including this one and said "I don't have a posse..." then amended it. "I am my posse." We all laughed and my teacher said that "I am my Posse" would make a good T-shirt slogan. Our conversation continued to cover other silly T-shirt slogans we had seen before. Here follows a list (with occasional explanation) of those and some more of my own found slogans:

"I am my Posse"

"IYQ" (just say it a few times...you'll get it)

"Toast" (with a picture of toast of course! All of us Toast Brigader's have them.)

"The Beatings Will Continue Until Moral Improves" (originally bought in Disneyland with the toast brigaders for wear on AP testing days...commented on by new band director during marching band season...next year's marching band shirts? hahaha I kid!)

"I Love Stripling Warriors" (I stopped wearing this one due to the partial illiteracy of immature Jr. High/High Schoolers...heh heh)

"I am plan B"

"Happy Trees" (with a picture of Bob Ross painting. I used to watch him on the tele all the time!)

"I'm in Pep Band and I'm OK!" (one of my High School Pep Band shirts)

"I'm a fermata, hold me"

"I embarrass my family" (often worn by my brother, but I think our family embarrasses our extended family....teehee)

"Bandits" (Well actually, that is what it said before I amended it to say BandGeek, then BandNeeek. I got a kick out of it.)

"Player" (Yes. On the back of one of my band hoodies. I voted against it, but lost. All well.)

That is all that comes to mind at the moment. Anymore? Share, share!!

-The BandNeeek

P.S. As this is Tie Thursday, I would like to add something I missed for my last Tie Thursday on Stair Adventures.

I have worked as a waitress in a wholesome, family friendly live dinner theater. In said theater are tiered seating to make every seat in the house a "good seat." Oft times we, as servers, had to deliver food and/or drinks after the lights had gone out. Up stairs, down stairs, through doors, squish between crowded tables and customers, all while carrying a full and heavy tray on one arm and the extra condiment, side, or stack of napkins in the other. In the Dark.

Soon after I started working there I was on one such delivery. I headed over to "Box 1" with a tray full of drinks: up the steps into the theater, up three more steps, across the house, down three, up two into the Box, and up one to one table. Deliver four drinks. Up one more step, deliver four (or five?) more drinks, and turn to go.

"Whomp!" went my foot down six inches farther than it should have with the rest me stumbling behind, barely catching myself before face-planting into the wood floor...wait, there IS a stair there! Many customers gave me a worried hand and "Are you okay"'s as I looked gratefully at my barely emptied tray. I assured them I was fine and could barely stifle my giggles as the play started at what I must have looked like on the way back to the kitchen.

Spills were common at our Theater, but not a nightly occurrence (between 2 and 4 shows a night depending on the time of year...pretty good statistics I think). We always did our best to avoid such spills , but sometimes it just happens leaving us or a costumer covered in sticky soda, smoothie, or sauce of some sort. The customers were usually very kind and understanding with us, for which I am grateful (although I have only had a couple minor spills), some of which actually give you a better tip (or pity tip). Those tips almost brought us to tears some nights where others didn't leave any tip when we worked so hard, or customers would refuse to be pleased no matter what we tried to do for them. For all of you who are kind to your waitresses/waiters/busboys/doormen/baggers/mailmen/garbagemen/service people I thank you. You make the whole day worth the work, especially when we trip over hidden stairs and spill our whole tray of drinks.

Happy Wednesday!

2007-02-21T17:33:00.000-07:00

Some days are just simply "good days" and some are "awesome days." Many times the difference is in the attitude I decide to have. Even if every little thing explodes, falls, squeaks, cracks, burns, or breaks doesn't mean I have to follow suit. A wise man once said, "They can take everything away from me, but they can't take away my attitude." This man was a Jewish man who had been held in a horrifying concentration camp during World War II. He made this comment after being held in said camp for a long time (months, or years I cannot remember).

The story of Job from the Bible explains the countless hardships and adversities a person can go through and yet still be an optimist in a field of pessimism. "The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taketh away, blessed be the name of the Lord!"

I have avoided using steroetypifying "good" and "bad" because I am trying to mold my attitude and thinking into a more optimistic lifestyle. Some days are harder than others to accomplish such a task, but I can see the true joy that radiates from those who have that bubbly, bright, positive, and smiling personality. They are a beacon to me on those harder days and my motivation to keep smiling.

Some such band-siblings of mine (I tend to think of most of my fellow band members as my second or third families) act as those beacons. Whether it be sharing a good laugh over what might happen if we brought our kitties to school and kept them in our band lockers, rejoicing over a "good" reed (which in some boxes tends to be quite rare), or finding that sometimes it might just be easier to sleep overnight in a practice room due to late night/early morning band commitments (don't worry, only speculative) they can always lift my spirits and bring a needed smile, hug, or snack during the school day.

Other days I feel as if I can be my own radiator of cheer and try to spread it in my own little quiet way, but I still have miles to go before I master that skill. One of the biggest contributors to my happy furnace is music. My brother said one day that whatever song he might play, with time he can find aspects of that song that he likes; therefore leading him away from disliking songs. I have felt the same way since I started playing, at first I may be indifferent to some songs, but after rehearsing them for so long I can't help but find things I love about it. Other songs leave me thrilled after one hearing.

Most of my High School band years were spent in the later circumstance. Whether my band director shaped all of his students to be like him or whether he just brought out that part of us naturally I am not sure. Probably some of both happened, but either way I instantly, or close to it, fell in love with every piece we played (which I attribute to the awesomeness of my band director's taste). This year has been different; new director with new tastes, and new band siblings. I do still enjoy many of the pieces we play, but only one or two so far has caught my love like the pieces of past years. Every time I play any of those songs I can't help but look like a smiling fool for hours. They give me an Adrenalin rush that only they can and boost my spirits up with the clouds.

I see now that I have gone off on a tangent and not gotten to any of the list of happy things I had ready to post on for the day. I will leave the list as is for your imagination to run away with and to not make any longer this monster post.

-tuner-clock invention

-essay paper turned in (relief! Hooray!)

-good reed

-happy music

-WARM sun sitting and reading

-Prospective Kite flying field=no power lines/poles!! Rules against flying kites on campus?=cleared!

I love you all!! Be safe!

-The BandNeeek

Motivating Monday Montage (MMM)

2007-02-20T21:32:00.000-07:00

-No school!

-Lots of new snow!

-Today is my Mom's birthday! Remember those free skiing passes I won from the Health Fair? Well, my Mom and I made use of them for her birthday (she loves to ski and I thought she would like to have a free ski-day...even though she spent the whole day teaching me on the super easy runs. I love my Mom!!)

-We rented skis and the rental guys were fantastic! They explained many technical things about our boots and skis to help us better understand and to help us get the best out of our ski-day. They even gave Mom an extra discount being her birthday. I love nice people!

-It was a wonderful day to go skiing! (My second time skiing, I have snowboarded only a couple times more, so I am pretty beginner) The snow was falling off and on in the canyons and it was beautiful and sunny in the valley when we headed home. Every time we came down a run there would be a layer of new snow, the snowcats couldn't keep up! It was a little bumpy, and when I got up the courage to go fast enough I was catching a little air off of said bumps. So fun, and I didn't fall (although I had a few close calls)!

-We decided to go up one of the smaller chairlifts (a two-seater with a pole in the middle to separate the two seats) and as I had gotten a hang of getting on and off of the other lifts I thought I was safe. I stumbled up to the "wait here to be seated" line (I am not so graceful when it comes to walking on skis) and tried to keep from sliding away. "Look to the middle!" Mom warned me. I obediently turned my head and "BONG" went the pole on the incoming chair as it collided mercilessly with the side of my face. In a daze I managed to board the lift. I later learned that my Mom had heard my "Bong" encounter, but didn't know it was my head. The lift operator must have held in his laughter until we were out of earshot, and just imagining the scene over makes me giggle. (but then whenever I imagine myself the scenes are always cartoonistic in action which makes me giggle in and of itself)

-Another time on the nicer chairlift we met an extremely nice lift-buddy (this lift was a three-seater) who rode up with us. He told us of how he comes here to ski in the winters from practically across the country and how he had skied almost every day of the skiing season . He had a really genteel and kind spirit about him and I was glad to have shared our seat with him. My day was happier because of his unrestrained and open friendliness.

-I got to spend the whole day with my Mom! We had so much fun together and I look up to her so much. I am lucky to have her. I wish everyone could have a mother like mine. :)

-The BandNeeek

Tie Thursday!

2007-02-16T15:13:00.000-07:00

On Friday? Well, yes. I am late, but that is alright. Allow me to explain.

In High School my friends instituted "Tie Thursday" where our little Brigade of friends (Formally known as the Toast Brigade) would wear ties on Thursdays (all of us being female). Random? Yes. Strange looks? Very yes, that's the funnest part! Some of our ties were plain church ties (borrowed from brothers/fathers), others had themes (one of my favorites was my friend's Star Wars tie with a Han Solo T-shirt), but all were ties.

I never did end up making it to Thursday days with a tie and so I am hoping to make up for it by introducing a Tie Thursday post. Tie Thursday is, by nature (coming from the Toast Brigade), utterly random; therefore, all of my Tie Thursday posts will be likewise, making it perfectly acceptable that this Tie Thursday is in fact on a Friday. And thus the space-time continuum collapses and chaos ensues. Enjoy!

STAIR ADVENTURES!

Wide ones, skinny ones, long ones, short ones, tall ones, squatty ones, worn ones, cracked ones, slippery ones, steep ones, never-ending ones, spiraling ones, ... There are all kinds of stairs I come across in my day-to-day life, but some of the most interesting stairs I have come across are those that have a grotesque sense of humor (which, I would hazard to say, includes all stairs). Stairs, whether 2-step or 572-step, enjoy tweaking their position ever so slightly when their climbers least expect it and laugh their gravely laugh as their victims tumble. (Those equipped with railings often accent the laugh with "bonging" guffaws.)

Such stairs use every insidious fiber within their stony steps in attempts to trick their patrons, whether they be old, young, empty-handed, or shouldering the world Atlas-style. Some of their favorite pranks involve: adding an extra stair where there previously wasn't thought to be one; sneaking up on unsuspecting bystanders (or bywalkers to be more accurate) before said person has time to prepare to step up/down; looking innocently wet, but turning out to be dangerously slippery; adjusting the height/width of certain steps 'just so' so that climbers mis-step enough to tumble; or just up and snapping at those who attempt to take the stairs at to fast a pace. All of this tomfoolery can cause embarrassment, bruises, and scattered belongings at the least (many of which give one a therapeutic opportunity to laugh at oneself).

That being said, I have had ample opportunity to laugh at myself. (If I were in Mary Poppin's "I Love to Laugh" scene I would probably have burst into the attic on some occasions) I have had my share of bruised shins and knees from falling up the stairs at school (which I often show off to my brothers), my books/papers/music/clarinet causing a mess and noisy racket. If someone is around (usually some handsome boy) I laugh an "oops" to myself. If no one is around I still laugh an "oops" to myself. Oft times the silly grin sticks through to my next classes and refuses to leave (which tends to be awkward when the lecture subjects gravitate towards stoichiometry, gravitational constants, King Leer, or Sigmund Freud...but then the fact that I can't wipe the silly grin off my face makes me giggle, and I am sure my teachers/classmates are convinced I am a nut when they see my straining face and tears (from laughter) streaming down my cheeks. Looking at their concerned faces just makes me laugh even more. Such a predicament.)

Stairs not only can be tears of silly giddiness, but sometimes tears of ouchiness. When I was just a mite of a girl (a tall mite for my age) I learned from my older siblings and cousins the joys of stair jumping, like base-jumping, but without the parachute and with a much lower threat to life. My grandmother has a staircase to her basement which has a wall on one side and a railing on the other side through which small bodies can squeeze and jump the <6-7 feet to the floor below. During extended family parties many of the younger kids would swarm the stairs and play our jumping sport. The smaller kids jumped the lower stairs and the older jumped the higher and all was fine and dandy.

Well, all was fine and dandy until I decided I wanted to jump the highest stair. Being only about 5 years old at the time, I should have stuck to the "medium" stairs and not the tall ones. I climbed back up after a few test jumps on a lower, medium, and medium-high stairs and slipped through the bars and perched on the edge of the stair, contemplating whether I was "ready" for such a high jump. In a moment of blurred reality the stair slipped away (silly, mischievous, disappearing stairs...) and I was floating like an astronaut, slow motion, and carefree. I could fly!

But, alas! Slow motion never is slow enough. I crashed, I crunched, I crumpled, I snapped, I did what most kids would do: I cried. At the doctor's office the next day I remember the horror on my mother's face when I smiled, flopped my broken wrist around, and said, "Look Mommy! It doesn't hurt anymore, I don't need to go to the doctor." I don't remember the pain, nor do I know where all the other kids disappeared to. I think the number of children present is inversely related to the inconvenient accidents that happen. (a lamp breaks? a bowl is dropped? Where's the kids?...must have been sucked into a black hole) I hold no grudge towards the stairs, but I did notice a significant lack of stair jumping events at family parties.

I enjoyed my bright pink cast with its surface smothered in autographs (the purpose of such a tradition evades me, but the fun of it doesn't), even though I couldn't open a door, ride my bike with both hands, or bathe properly for 6 weeks.

Stairs give us convenience (escalators get a +10 in convenience points) and help us get from lower place to upper place and made possible multiple story buildings, and excitingly spooky stairwells. Thank you to the inventor of the staircase, but don't forget that to every bright, sunlit stair there is a dark side, full of pranks and sadistic humor.

Be grateful, but also Be Wary of the Stair.

-BandNeeek

Kite Flying and Blood Donating

2007-02-14T15:27:00.000-07:00

Concert day today! That means band class was cancelled in order to "save our chops" for the performance (although what do many band people do with their new-found time? Practice. We are a silly bunch of cookies). During what would have been band many of us sat outside the band room in the "band hall," a popular gathering place for all people instrumental (with the occasional vocalist), and talked of pressing matters, such as: our lunches, the silliness of Valentines day, cheered on a crutch-bound cellist who decided to pick up all the garbage (three wrappers) in the hall...with his crutches, what kinds of limitations there are on giving blood, flying kites, and so forth.

Only one of us hadn't really flown a kite before, but there were a few of us (myself included) who had never given blood before. I promised the one that we would have to go fly a kite, and suggested we all have a blood donating party at the next school-wide drive and we could fly kites immediately afterwords. That got some laughs and looks, but my friend and I are still planning on it.

We talked about our blood drive (non) experiences: some weighed too little, others had been out of the country, one had her ears pierced, one had had surgery, another had recent tattoos, or some just general fear. All things preventing the donation of blood during blood drives (one such drive was going on today....Valentines day. Valentines--Vampires... I laugh at the silly irony, but also digress). When another band friend came we asked her if she had ever donated.
"Yup."
"Whaaa?? You have?! Tell us all about it!"

We were educated on "the strange-ness" of it all, and given advice about eating and drinking plenty before/after, not exercising hard for a day or so, the free treats afterwards, and how she hadn't felt well the next day. I told her about our plans of flying kites right after donating and she laughed and said, "okaaay..." and gave us a silly look.

We just smiled and said, "It'll be exciting!"

Reminds me of when we learned about cultural norms in my Sociology class and how people react when someone breaks them. Our book recommended a few to use for experimental purposes (such as facing the other people in an elevator, insisting to pay more than the listed price for something at the store, over-dressing for regular everyday activities, etc.). I could hardly keep back my giggles as the possible reactions of people ran through my mind. The rest of the class was having giggling problems, too.

We got the same norm-breaking looks from our plans. Harmless, legal norm-breaking is fun!

Have some fun today and break a cultural norm (as long as you are not breaking the law or causing harm/hurt to yourself or anyone else). Stay safe and laugh lots!

-The BandNeeek

Little Lessons

2007-02-13T16:17:00.001-07:00

Happy Tuesday to ya! Today I would like to present a few small points of advice I have newly ( and not so newly) acquired (mostly so I don't forget them).

1- Don't eat grapefruit in the car. Especially if you don't have anyway to wash your hands afterwords.

2- When your reeds die get new ones, otherwise you can play your guts out (feeling like you are trying to blow over a brick wall with a straw), and only end up stopping to catch your breath after two bars, feeling lightheaded, and raw-ify the inside of your lip. (doesn't work so well during 4+ hours of playing) (By the way, my sister-in-law gave me some new reeds!! It is like Christmas, so happy!)

3- If you are a major soloist in a band (not me :) ) don't miss a dress rehearsal unless pre-approving it with your director, otherwise everyone will have to have an extra dress rehearsal immediately before the concert (which is tomorrow for me...YAY!)

4- Film canisters filled with reed-soaking water are life savers (or spit savers) when you are breaking in a new box of reeds. (I changed my reed 12-13 times during a rehearsal today...teehee)

5- Take advantage of "Free," especially when you don't have an income. (Free food, free shirts, free kittens...happy times!)

6- Rejoice over little things (like finding a parking spot, not falling up the stairs (more on stairs soon!!), new reeds, running (clean) water, food, ...). Things will look brighter and happier.

7- Don't forget to laugh at yourself.

8- If you want to become a teacher stock up on the Vitamin C, airborne, orange juice, and chicken noodle soup. The kiddies are always being so thoughtful and sharing their sicknesses with you. :) Especially your first year teaching them.

9- Just because it looks warm outside and feels warm from the sun shining through the windows doesn't mean it is warm outside.

10- Keep an emergency stash of chocolate in your car.

11- Don't leave said emergency chocolate in the sun in your car.

12- Don't eat all of your emergency chocolate as soon as you put it in your car.

13- Grapefruit/other citrus fruit peels make the car smell good, but don't leave them there for too long...things could get ugly.

14- Check your shoelaces often.

15- Check the toilet paper levels before you choose a stall.

16- Don't drink reed-soaking water.

17- "Smile, it confuses people" (or might just make their day)

18- Decide to be happy. Your attitude is one of the only things that cannot be taken from you.

...And I think I will be done for now. I have eaten muches of pizza...can pizza give you a sugar high? I think it can, because I can't focus very well anymore (if you couldn't tell from my jumbled/half hazard list...).

This is the BandNeeek signing off for now! I loves you all and wish you the happiest!

-BandNeeek

Motivating Monday Montage

2007-02-12T15:53:00.000-07:00

This is a new category of posts where I will list things that happened throughout the day that made me smile. I find so many Monday Blues that I decided it needed to be done away with or at least alleviated a little. I hope my silliness will help someone smile through their slow Monday!

-While walking to the Math building I saw a boy who held the door open for not just one person behind him, but the whole gaggle of bumbling math students before he finally left his doorpost.

-The sun came out and was warm on my face when the breeze didn't blow (it is a balmy 43 or so degrees today!).

-I walked with one of my fellow Clarineters to Band (I don't often walk with people between classes...just me and my silly, tangential thoughts, legs walking on autopilot) and talked about our good weekends, our concert on Wednesday, and Clarineter-ish stuff.

-A few of us Clarineters came to a consensus that whenever randomly asked to play (the clarinet) alone during (band) class it is inevitable that your reed will revolt against you, or your clarinet simply decide to be out of tune, but as soon as you go back to playing as an ensemble it goes right back to being in tune and sounding pretty (as opposed to gurgly, airy, sharp, congested, or painful). We laughed about it all.

-Even though my reed sounded not so happy at me when asked to play in aforesaid circumstances both my section leader and band director told me it sounded good. (Although I secretly giggle and think they took my wobbly sounding reed for nervousness)

-I turned in some of my "Band Tour" release forms. (even though I got the strange feeling I was signing away my life's fortune, or first born (kitty/clarinet/saxophone) after reading through them)

-I tripped over my feet when attempting to approach the stairs in the stairwell. A girl behind me and I laughed about how when such things happen when we are alone we don't mind because we already know we are idiots, but that trippings, slippings, and dramatic headlong tumbles often happen while other are watching (in which case I laugh harder)...more on adventures on stairs to come soon, I will devote I whole post to it. :)

-Upon returning to my car this afternoon I found a lovely little coupon for a free medium pizza at Local Pizza Place! Yay free dinner for the BandNeeek at her long-ish dress rehearsal tomorrow night!

-I kidnapped an apple and a grapefruit from my home-home yesterday for my lunchtime munchies this week. Today? Apple+Peanut Butter = So yummy for my tummy!

I hope you have all had a happy Monday! Leave some comments about some of your motivating (or not so much) Monday scenes, I would love to hear from you!

--The BandNeeek

Week's Worth

2007-02-07T16:05:00.000-07:00

So. This week had been a happy week. That is what I have decided. Let's start from where I left you...Monday? Yes, that'll work. Monday it is! (Warning: This is a rambling and non-centralized post! Read at your own risk of becoming bored and/or lost in silly little stories)

MONDAY

Sunny weather and unseasonably warm. Learned about the geography of Germany in my German class, and how cows live in the fields/pastures in the agricultural areas of Germany. I remember the silly things my friends and I would come up with in our Jr.High and High school german classes, most of which included a dead cow head (hurray for making use of our very limited vocabulary!). Fun times.

In my Calculus class we took notes on calculus concepts (all of which are still review for me, as I took the class in high school, but review is good). Oft times my mind wanders when taking notes on things that I already understand confidently. It started when we began "Decomposing Functions" at the beginning of class. My imagination immediately bounded off in tangential angles, leaving my eyes and hand to finish taking notes from the board. I will let your imagination roam from there as I have just deleted my sorry attempt at explaining my own random thought processes...I am sure you would have been quite lost.

In the evening I found out that my Seester (sister) is getting married! My Seester!! I am so excited and happy for her!! (as well as still in denial, I can't believe it! It is so cool!!)

TUESDAY

Today was also quite warmer than February is supposed to be (around 50 degrees), in fact I think it is the warmest it has been all year! Cool! I rolled down my windows on the way home and thought about marching band practice when I passed our practice field (the girl's soccer team was out practicing on the 'plowed' (?) field...I didn't know they plowed astro-real turf...).

Switched some seating placements in band. Now the first players are on the inside/in the middle while the thirds are on the outside (for flutes and clarinets anyway). Wonder if/how long that will last, but it is very interesting to hear the band from a different place. Neat stuff, acoustics.

I have been having to park in farther-away-parking-lot, which involves crossing one of the busier roads on campus instead of my happy parking lot which is right close to the "Band" building. I don't mind walking the extra bit, but sometimes it takes a little while to be able to cross the road when there are alot of cars going by. I wait patiently, a couple minutes won't kill me. Car, car, car, GAP!!...oh wait, car from the other way (should I call it "rac" if it is coming from the "other way?" -teehee-). Car, car, rac, rac, rac...Gap...wait, make sure it is a real gap...nope another rac was hiding...car car...Gap....still gap... speed walk across the street, head bouncing left, right, left, right with every step. (I don't want to end up as a smear in the asphalt)

Today, on my way back to my car after all of my classes, I stood and waited. Only a couple seconds passed and the cars that were coming (one in each direction of the three way intersection) slowed and stopped. I must've looked confusedly at the nearest car who waved me across the street. I smiled and I think (I hope) I waved back and said (or mouthed) thank you. I love when people are so kind and unselfish! It makes me happy.

WEDNESDAY

I saw and gave a happy "Hi" to a fellow marching band-er that I haven't seen since around marching band times last semester (said person isn't in Band-band), and received a happy "Hi" back. Ah, the joys of being easily made happy.

After school I got my oil changed (finally!) and felt so silly at my not knowing that you are supposed to drive your car up to the garage and wait there for an attendant rather than park and wander up looking for an attendant. All well. I am sure they will have a good giggle about my ignorance of "the system" of such places/things as I am. I like being able to laugh at myself, I get entertainment wherever I go!

REST OF THE WEEK

It was my brother's birthday on Thursday (I wished him a happy birthday in which he replied that I was his favorite BandNeeek, and I in return replied I was the only BandNeeek he knew...I love having a unique name : D), and on Friday we had sort of a family birthday party for him. I love my family functions. We have lots of fun together, plus I got to see my Seester (the one who is now engaged!!! I am still so happy and excited for her!).

I also got to play at a couple girls basketball games (Pep Band) and found out that the girls, even though they are doing just about as well as their male counterparts in basketball land, their games are vastly less attended. I am glad we were there to play, it was fun and I love to play.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend!! Stay safe and smile your face off!

--The BandNeeek

Cleaning Frenzy and Pump Rage

2007-02-04T19:30:00.000-07:00

Have you ever gotten in a mood where you just feel like cleaning something and when you finish said task you find your cleaning craving not satisfied and before you know it you have accomplished many extra cleaning tasks. Such carrying away in cleaning may lead one to lose track of time thus causing one to miss the magical pre-rush hour happy traffic time, but then, no longer in a hurry to 'beat the rush,' you find you have time to leisurely fill up one's car with much needed gas and wash some of the built up guck on one's car windows (but only the driver's side of the car before another car pulls up behind and the pump goes schunk as it tops off the tank). One may then smile at the nice man waiting behind you, hop into the driver's seat, turn the key, click. Turn the key, click. Turn the key, click.

By this time a smidgeon of worry might creep into the back of one's mind as you open your door to express a hopeless and sincere apology to the nice man behind you, who is now looking quite angry and the nice young man at the next-door pump gives you an apologetic look. One wishes the nice young man was waiting behind you instead of the nice unhappy man who presently occupies his spot, or that by some luck the unhappy man will just keep his unhappy expression inside his car. One fears those infected with road rage, or those infected with the similar gas pump impatientness.

One hurriedly hops back in the driver's seat. "Please, please, please start so that the nice man behind me won't get any more angry with me..." Turn key, click. Turn key, click. Turn key, click. Take out key. Put in key. Turn key, chkchkchkchkpraaaawwWWWW! Ah, the happiness of one's car purring to life. One is saved from gas pump rage man (I am sure he must've just been in a real hurry to somewhere, I hope he made it alright.) and eventually makes it back home (an hour late due to opening up the hood and messing with things and asking a friend about the workings of car batteries before driving the hour home) to later find that the battery connections were just loose. YAY for simple solutions and simple problems!

I got to play at a Pep Band game...erm "Basketball" game (tee hee) last night and found out that we get to play at a few extra games the next couple weeks. I love to play, and pep band is always fun. Especially when we win silly little things. Fun times.

Hope you had a wonderful weekend! Keep up the smiles, someone could be watching you! Stay safe, and don't get too angry with other drivers on the road or at the pump. : )

-The Band Neeek

Happy Snow!

2007-02-01T17:13:00.000-07:00

The weather has finally brought me snow again and with it, however scanty it may be, fresh clean air, blue skies, and a little warmth. Most of it ends up melting by the later afternoon (well, at least that has been the case for the not quite 1-2 inches we have received the past couple days), but I am so glad it is back! I was starting to think that my reeds (especially my 'best' reed, which has a sad little notch out of the tip) were just starting to go the way of old reeds; they weren't playing, or "speaking," as reliably, and they were very resistant to producing the nice warm tone that they had been doing. I thought it was long past time to replace them, but hadn't (still haven't) done it yet.

Yesterday I had another surprise with the snow and clear air, I could breathe again! I didn't quite realize it until I played on my same silly, chipped reed in band. It sounded warm, woody, and just as pretty as it had before! I am so happy that my reeds haven't quite kicked the bucket yet! They can be on the expensive side of things when one is a (presently) job-less student.

Since my last post I have been paying more attention to when and why I get out of breath during the day. I know I am just being obsessive, I think its a phase that I will grow out of in a couple/few weeks, but for now I will just continue my silly unwritten records and telling you all about them. I am sure you find them all sorts of interesting. I sure find it interesting when I find I only have to walk the length of a building, or 2-3 flights of stairs before I can no longer get enough air by just breathing through my nose.

I hope you are all having a wonderful February so far! Don't forget to smile at strangers as you pass by, you may not only get a silly look full of confusion back, but you may brighten someone's day for a moment. Best Wishes!

-The Band Neeek

Normalcy?

2007-01-26T14:54:00.000-07:00

This week has been a standard week: go to class, take notes, take notes, take notes, play clarinet, go home, eat, read/laze about/homework/play with the puppy, sleep, wake up and do it all over again. I am so glad I have my car back! I love to drive, leave when I want, go as slow as I want, go the way I want, and follow other cars as far back as I want (sometimes buses scare me...they drive so close to the other cars on the road, I think it's a miracle that they aren't in more crashes!).

I have gone running a few times this week (indoors, on a treadmill. Outside the air is so full of guck that one almost has to trudge along the sidewalk, like through mud. Yucky). It always feels nice to run, well most of the time. The beginning is nice, finishing is nice, and the way you feel after is nice. The middle is just meh. I ran track and a little cross country in high school (never competed or anything, just worked out) with one of my best friends. Ah, we had some good times. We would sing our favorite band song of the day during workouts, frolic about the empty after-school halls, and have all sorts of fun while torturing our bodies with some of those evil workouts in 90-100's degree temperatures. -shiver-

When we would run to warm-up, stretch, and run to warm-up again I liked to run around those who carried on conversations with other people. I couldn't carry on a conversation for long, but it helped me to be able to listen to someone else's' instead of concentrating on simply running. I thought that I was just less "in shape" than those others because of lacking the ability to talk and jog at the same time. I was taking a P.E. class during that spring and consequently was running/working out the hour and a half during class in the mornings, and then the hour and a half of track workouts after school throughout the semester. This might make me sound super athletic, I do not think I deserve the title. Jogging wasn't, and still isn't, the easiest thing for me; my muscles fatigue, my lungs/chest feel tight or ache, I can't breathe adequately through my nose like I have always been advised to do (in through the nose, out through the mouth), and I often get a cough that lasts from a few hours to a couple days depending on how much I run and how cold the air is that I run in. Even by the end of the semester I couldn't hold a conversation whilst jogging. I thought that those who could were just that much more in shape than I was, and I thought that all of the aforementioned effects of running were normal, that everyone felt them like I did.

I have learned that one of my siblings has a mild asthma and it occurred to me that I might have the same thing. I read about asthma, but mostly read about severe asthma. Mild asthma has become a sort of side, short-term research project, but less formal. More like "Hey! That looks interesting, let's read it."

I was talking about it with some of my family and was told I should probably go see a doctor to see if I do have a mild form of asthma, but I am reluctant. I don't want to bother with a silly little thing when I am not suffering unduly from my symptoms and they don't really get in the way of my everyday life. I don't want to take up a doctor's time with such a little thing when they could be helping someone who needs it more than I do. I don't want to be a bother. I don't want to be a whiner. I don't want to be burdensome. For now I think I will keep running and listening while others do the conversing, and my favorite band song of the day plays in the back of my mind in time with my shoes.

My Car--She Lives!

2007-01-18T17:34:00.000-07:00

Fantastic News!!! ....wait, let me start from the begining first. 'Tis a good place to start.

Alright, so I left you Tuesday (not yesterday, Thursday, or Wednesday...especially not Friday...yes I tried to type those in. My poor brain is stuck on today (meaning everyday this week) being Friday, silly brain) afternoon with my missing school due to my car refusing to start. Kept trying to fix it, etc.etc. (meaning I'd rather not talk about the rest of the evening...I was less than perky and bubbly)

Next morning (Wednesday) found me waking up and my wonderful mother and awesome neighbor coming to save the day! Awesome neighbor hooks up the jumper cable (my poor battery had apparently died overnight, probably due to my trying ALL day long the day before to get it to start) to my car and we try to jump start it. Nada. We are all frozen, but my awesome neighbor gets his tools out, removes the battery (so we can get a new one), and rushes off to work (he was probably late, he's awesome!). We get a new battery (after waiting for the local auto parts store to open) and another neighbor helps us put it into my car (it is quite a strange battery setup, but what do I know about cars? Not much.).

In the middle of all this it is still very cold (being just before the sunrise into soon after sunrise) and I would like to offer some advice. When it is quite chilly outside and your extremities are already numb, even if you are wearing a magical scarf (all scarves are magical in that they make you oh-so-much warmer!), don't hold your keys (or anything else metallic in nature) in your bare hands. It burns (or freezes, whichever you prefer, the line between is waifly thin). Ouch.

Back to new battery, one that is better for starting in cold weather. We stick her in and turn the key. "Grumblegrumblegrumblegrumble." Back to the sounds of yestermorning. Ah, but I much prefer the "grumblegrumble" to the "click." Much happier. My other awesome neighbor offers a suggestion, a god mechanic he knows. We call round, decide that the car will have to go in the next day due to lack of towing vehicles. Mom decides to drive me up to school so I won't have to miss another day, even though I had been acting not so perky and bubbly, even though my school is an hours drive away, even though Mom will end up missing a half day at work (and I half of my classes). Did I mention that my mom is wonderfully amazing and fantastic? Well, remind me to mention it for every second of the rest of my life.

I get to school drop off my instrument/music, and Mom drives me to the other side of campus to my class of the hour (only ten minutes late, too). I love my Mom. I go to my last two classes (of my four that day) and get a call from my brother asking if I need a ride home then he or my sister-in-law could pick me up after they get off work. I love my family. I end up getting my free bus pass (YAY for free things...well paid for in my tuition anyway) and riding the bus with a friend (who drives me the rest of the way home). I love my friends. (Another one of my friends had offered to pick me up in the morning if I needed a ride, too. I feel so loved.)

The next morning (Thursday...Hey! That's today!) my brother drives me to the bus stop on the way to work. Yay for bus stops! It was a bit chilly again, but I didn't have to wait long. On the bus I ended up sitting next to a really nice girl who answered all my silly questions about where the bus stopped and things. I love nice people. I got to school a few hours early so I sat by the band room (my third home) and read a book (and almost finished it), got flirted with by a cute little baby, got to sample a hand softener system, and generally lazed about until my classes. I got to my first class and was greeted and talked to by another classmate (yay for sneaking around the edges of my comforting shy bubble) who I happened to find out was in another of my classes, then who walks in but the sweet girl from the bus! Wow! Happy times and coincidences that don't happen by coincidence.

I finished up the rest of my classes and headed back to the bus stop to catch a bus home. A handful of people there turned into a crowd, then turned into just a couple of us as a few buses stopped before my bus came. One other girl was waiting for my same bus, we were silent most of the time as other buses came and took away the crowds that had gathered. She asked me if I knew where the gym on campus was. I told her as best I knew (I am not yet an expert on my campus). We made a little small talk, she told me about her having a hard time recently in life and explained to me some of her frustrations, discouragements, and heartache, and I asked questions and tried to give the best advice I could. She told me about how she wanted to just work off all her steam at the gym and how she didn't tell her roommates or even her boyfriend where she was, or where she was going. I worry for her.

Mostly I was just trying to be someone to listen. People need to have others who they can just pour out everything on, sometimes it works best if you know your listener well, other times it is best to have strangers as listeners. I tried my best to become a dry sponge for her to throw out her ill feelings and I can only hope that I took some of her hurt away. Her stop came, she got up. She said "Thanks for letting me vent to you." I said, "Anytime, I hope everything turns out okay for you." She got off, I don't think I will see her again, but I do truly hope everything works out for her. I hope I was enough to help her not be so depressed or discouraged, but I may never know. Maybe I was nothing to her, did nothing for her, wasn't empathetic enough for her, but I hope I was. I may never know, I can only hope.

***Back from the beginning!***

Fantastic news!! My mother phoned me last night to tell me that my car is working again! Her friend came over and tried, tried, and tried again to get it to start...Persistance wins! My car--she purred to life and runs beautifully again! Ah, my car. I am again so grateful for frozen automobie fluids (as opposed to something more serious and costly which I would have no chance of affording), my Mom, her friends, my neighbors, and my family for helping me to get along without and trying to help fix my car! I am so excited to be able to get it back (it is still at my home-home) over this weekend. I love the bus and public transportation, but sometimes I want to get home in the 20 minutes it takes to drive and not the hour and a half it takes to ride/walk, but only when I am really hungry. :) I need the exercise anyway, makes me feel good and not so lazy.

I hope you have had a wonderful day! Be safe and eat your toast! Thank someone for something and tell them you love them, for no reason. Smile at someone, at everyone--it makes the world, and you, happier. Especially since tomorrow is the REAL Friday of the week! (I will probably second guess myself all day since I have already had so many "Friday"s this week already) I am so excited! I loves you all!

-The Band Neeek

Frozen Cars

2007-01-16T10:02:00.000-07:00

So, as you might have noticed much of the U.S. has had an ice cube put down it's back, and in it's gloves, and shoes...almost like an ice bath, or in some places an ice shower. It is cold outside, quite cold. And sunny. Ah, if only it would snow again, but alas the weather man tells me that a High Pressure is parked above us and is planning on staying a while. Now, this is all well and good seeing as I don't mind the cold too much, but my car seems to disagree.

This morning found me getting ready to head back up to school after a glorious long weekend; getting school books/notebooks/instruments gathered, getting dressed, re-curling a few pieces of hair (I hardly ever do anything more with my hair than wash it, let it dry, and ponytail/bun it...unless I get bored or "just feel like it"--the latter applied last night), feeding the animals, turning the ignition to my car... "grumblegrumblegrumble," says my car. "Uh-oh," says my me. I scrape off my frosty windows and try again. "grumblegrumbleGRUM-blegrumble," says my car. I head back inside and thaw my fingers (I am so grateful I have a warm house to come back inside to with warm running water!!).

I try again in a half hour, "GRUmblegrumblegrumble." Another half hour, "grumblegrumble." I look at the sun, now risen and spreading its mocking "warmth" and then to my car. Poor car. I eat some toast (doubles as comfort food and breakfast!). I have now missed my first two classes, but those I can be forgiven for missing. My last class is not so kind about absences, band. I am not worried though. I know that my car will warm up soon and try again, "grumbleGRumBLEgrumblegrumblegrumble." Always turning, almost catching, always missing. Each time my classical radio station chimes in its cello concerto, flute descant, or violin discussion as if to comfort the strains of my car and to pat it on the hood. I listen for a minute, watch my frozen breath fog up the windshield and turn the key again, "grumblegrumblegrumblegrumble."

I come back inside and write my band professor an e-mail, "Car is frozen, might not make it to class..."

The cats are happy that I haven't left them yet as they have all managed to sneak back inside. I am starting to think that my car would have liked to do the same, and feel sorry for it, the cold sun its only defroster. No drip-dripping from the icicles hanging off the house even though the sun is now directly overhead, perhaps the warmest part of the day and now missing half of band.

I pass the bathroom and spot the curling iron that I left out to cool and decide to put it away only to find that when I had switched it "off" I had actually only switched it to "low." I switch it off, really off this time, and pause a moment and wonder what might have happened if my car had started the first time and I had left with the iron still on and hot. I say a silent prayer of gratitude and know that there are guardian angels watching over me and my family. A day of missed classes can be made up so much easier than what might have been had I not missed them. I am grateful for slushy automobile fluids!

Happy First Week of the New Semester!

2007-01-12T20:18:00.000-07:00

I made it through the first week of the new semester, YAY! Really, it wasn't too bad, in fact it was pretty stinkin' good! And now, whether you want it or not, I will proceed to tell you about it, because it makes me happy. Of the two threatened auditions (each for placement in different bands I am in) only one of them ended up being required, which is awesome seeing as auditions are far from my favorite thing in the world. Ironic seeing as band is up at the top of my favorite things list. Surely a band-hater wouldn't have soundtracks to their dreams, especially if said soundtrack included in-dream compositions, various band songs, and any other random song. I love it.

I got a reply from one of my local fire departments about possibly participating in a ride-along (which I have been wanting to do for some time to see whether wanting to be a Paramedic/Fire(wo)man is just a stage or something that I really want to do). That e-mail made my day, I am so excited! All I have to do now is call them back...I hate the phone. I love the freedom of time and editing abilities that writing allow. My thinking is slower on my feet and I often reflect to previous conversations I've had and fuss about things I should have rephrased or things I should/shouldn't have added. Perhaps I just need more practice getting out of my shy comfort-bubble and talking with people.

I attended a Health Fair over the past weekend with one of my best friends and, naturally, we had a blast! We got tons of anti-oxidant/energizing/health drink samples, lots of interesting information, a free (albeit short) massage, and entered into many drawings for fun prizes. By the end of the day we were on a healthy buzz of sorts and bouncing off the walls. I got a call earlier this week informing me that I had won one such drawing for two ski/snowboard passes. Awesome! Now I just need to get over my fear of going off the bunny hills... I have been on "real" runs, I just have a thing for the bunny hill. : ) Maybe some day I will grow out of it.

I have played in three Pep Band games, Basketball games for those of you more sport-watching oriented, in the past week. Pep Band is fun (although I have to admit Marching Band is more fun. Can't wait for Marching Band season!!). I get to play, I get to feel special by getting into sports functions with my instrument as a ticket, I get more band T-shirts, I get to play, I get to hang out with my band family, occasionally (like last weekend) I get really good half-off-of-real-tasty-Italian-fast-food coupons, and I get to play!

I have successfully avoided the on campus bookstore and only have one more book to track down and buy. Yay for finding cheaper used textbooks!

It snowed about six inches this past week! I love the snow. There is something about the way it makes everything so white, pure, and softens otherwise harsh edges. I love the way snowflakes fall so softly and gently. I love the taste. I love to be out shoveling the walks. I love having snowflakes stick to my hair and eyelashes. I love to be the first to walk/drive outside and see the flawless blanket of white over the world. I love the way the snow sets on the trees around walkways and roads weighing down overhanging branches. The snow just makes me happy.

Well, I think I have done enough rambling for now. (and I can't think of anything else of interest that I have done this week) Stay safe and have a happy day!

Welcome to My Cozy Little Niche

2007-01-11T10:11:00.000-07:00

Hello there! You might be asking yourself who, where, or what I am, which is reasonable amount of curiosity, but due to my becoming increasingly wary of...well, many things, my secret identity will remain just that. Secret. Top Secret. If it makes you feel better you may think of me as a Super Hero whose anonymity is key to their survival as such. Or you may not. Either way is fine by me.

So, now you have been cold-heartedly rejected of all your previous queries you might be asking yourself why I am here, or how I got to be here. Or maybe you are asking yourself why and how you even got here in the first place. The former I could give some insight to, but, alas, the latter is left for you to explain to me. I am curious about you as well you know, so go ahead and leave a comment if you wish. As to why I might have spontaneously appeared out of thin net-space air, well, to be honest I was truly hoping in my sneaky appearance to, in a thin net-space air sort of way, jump out and scare the socks off of some unsuspecting person. But such things can be quite difficult in such a place. All well, I tried.

Now you are probably more lost than you had been before you even glanced towards my little space (whatever it might have been that urged you to glance my way), or perhaps you have already gotten sick of me and have left. That leaves me and...me. Hooray! A party! All "me's" invited! "Me"ercats, "Me"rcedes, "Me" kitties, "Me"...ahem. Back to "why am I here." I have decided to have this as an online (public) journal of sorts...where I ramble about school, work, play, random thoughts, and whatever else fits my whim at the time (whilst changing all names, places, and other identifying information so as to keep my Super Hero Mask intact.

Thank you for visiting. Please keep track of your outer appendages and loose change, children, minds, cheese, hair-pieces, and toasters. Enjoy your questings!